Sunday, October 26, 2008

giant raspberry on your nose

Ok it's obvious that I have homework : )

1. What are your initials? HJEC

2. What is your favorite thing to wear? My banana boxers and tree hugging dirt worshipper shirt.

3. Last thing you ate? Black bean and spinach quesadilla and sister mary’s righteous root beer.

4. Name one thing that scares you: loud noises

5. I say Shotgun, you say: get in the back ho

6. Who was the last person in your bed? Person? Seriously? Our golden retrievers own the bed.

7. What were you doing at 7:00am? sleeping

8. Last person you hugged? robert

9. Does anyone you know want to date you? Yes, and he is.

10. When was your last encounter with the police? I happen to work with a cute officer. He loaned me his coat once. It weighed about 60 pounds but smelled extraordinary. But no, I haven’t been pulled over yet.

11. Have you ever driven without a license? Occasionally. But not on purpose.

12. The last place you went out to dinner? Subway lol

13. Do you like your name? Yes

14. What time of the day is it? It’s 5ish

15. Who/What made you angry today? Nothing!

16. Do you want anyone? HAHAHA

17. Do you like birds? Yes

18. Favorite holiday? I don’t need to go through this again, do I?

19. Do you download music? sometimes

20. Do you care if your socks are dirty? yes

21. Opinion of Chinese symbol tattoos? Why express yourself with a language that you may not understand.

22. What are you doing tonight? Finishing laundry and homework, a walk with the pups and my Robert is making dinner.

23. Do you like to cuddle? Not usually. Although I am in a house FILLED WITH CUDDLERS! It’s hard to say no.

24. Do you love anyone? I would hope so. Robin has a point here.

25. Whose bed did you sleep in last night? See #6

26. Have you ever bungee jumped? NO

27. Have you ever gone whitewater rafting? I would be right there with you mom, but only if we had someone there to save our asses.

28. Has anyone ten years older than you ever hit on you? Let’s not go there.

29. How many pets do you have? Fish, snails and my two goldens.

30. Have you met a real redneck? I don’t have to look very far.

31. How is the weather right now? Windy enough to yank the lips right off your face. And cold.

32. What are you listening to right now? Kate nash!

33. What was the last movie you watched? The Happening. Don’t watch it. Honestly, it’s a waste of time.

34. Do you wear contacts? yes

35. Where was the last place you went besides your house? Lowes (I know I know)

36. What are you wearing? I’m still in tennis gear.

37. What's one thing you've learned this year? Oh many many things.

38. What do you usually order from Starbucks? I’m not a Starbucks person. I do love my weekly cup of joe though. I usually get it from a secret place close to home. I get a d s sf gcc (decaf skim sugarfree german chocolate cake). I like to take all the fun out of things.

39. Ever had someone sing to you? Robert sings to me all the time. And sometimes my mom slips something in her coffee and feels the need to sing to me. I’m not complaining.

40. Have you ever fired a gun? No

40 1/2. Are you missing someone? I missed my momalu last night.

41. Favorite TV? BIG BANG THEORY

42. What do you have an obsession with? Nothing super

43. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celeb? um
44. Who would you like to see right now? My family

45. Ever had a near death experience? Mom I was not hysterical and it was way longer than 45 minutes. I was the one rowing your crazy ass to shore woman. Sure, I wasn’t in the right state of mind, but we were in a SINKING KAYAK. At least I wasn’t singing or acting like we were on a yacht having a beer together. But would I do it all over again? Yes.

46. Are you afraid of falling in love? I haven’t fallen into anything folks, nor am I afraid too.

47. Have you ever been caught doing something you weren't supposed to?
I remember when Scott and I were planning on running away and living in grandma’s RV. It was only after we cleared out the kitchen that we got caught. I also got caught with various animals in my closet growing up. My mother seems to remember only the things with scales.

48. Has anyone you were really close to passed away recently? nope

49. Our Lady Peace or Nickelback? Not a clue

50. What's something that really bugs you? Insensitivity

51. Do you like Michael Jackson? I like his earlier music

52. Taco Bell or Burger King? No and no

53. Next time you will kiss someone? You are going to get a giant raspberry on your nose mom.

54. Favorite baseball team? I think I’d rather watch paint dry.


55. Ever call a 1-900 phone number? No

56. Nipple or Nose rings? Piercings freak me out

57. What's the longest time you've gone without sleep? I can’t win this. I love sleep too much.

58. Last time you went bowling? It’s been a month or so. Too long.

59. Where is the weirdest place you have slept? I once slept at a drug dealer’s house. It was while I was waiting to move to kc. It was that or my car. I never even met the guy. I Just knew his girlfriend. She was completely oblivious to his ‘business'. I slept like a rock though. I’ve also fallen asleep at IHOP, in the back of a truck (beautiful view), and in a bathtub with no water.

60. Who did you last speak with on the phone? james

61. What does your last received text message say? Just Justin talking smack. Poor guy doesn’t have any balls.

62. What's the closest orange object to you? Seriously? That would be me.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Nope, that's 'vagina'

So, this is my second post with the word 'vagina' in it. I like to start things off with a bang. Now honestly, think about this. How would you describe 'bang' to someone who has never experienced its sound? Pay attention and you shall see.

I am struggling with simple words. If I don't watch myself, 'shy' accidentally becomes 'whore'. Really folks, one finger makes a difference. I was scared of the word 'bug' for awhile. I knew that 'penis' and 'orgasm' were too close for comfort. One slip of my hand can prove that my appetite has nothing to do with food. 'Triangle' and 'pizza' are not what they look like. Nope, that's 'vagina'.

As most of you know I am learning ASL.

Every week I transition between signed english and ASL for various classes. These are two very different languages. With signed english everything is signed. With ASL many words are not used, and oftentimes the sentence is rearranged. ASL is a beautiful and intimidating language to learn. After you watch this video I challenge you to turn off the sound. You may be surprised to find that little has changed.

On a separate note:

Really folks, there is just so much beauty out there.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008


Over the weekend we went to Branson. On the way back we stopped at Busiek State Park. Busiek is one of my most favorite places. The trails are for everyone: horses, bikers, hikers and pups. The closest thing we have to that in KC is the zoo and the bar next door. Stopping at Busiek made me realize just how much I am missing out of life by living in a city. As soon as my education is finished I am out of here and back to the country, no doubt about it.

(When you click on the pictures they become HUGE. Me and this mac aren't getting along. . .)

After they romped all over the place they took a long rest in the creek. Rose even dozed off a couple of times.

Monday, October 13, 2008


You know, we need to get more EXCITED about being alive. So many problems could be solved with a little enthusiasm, a little respect, a tiny bit of nice here and there.

Every day I eat lunch alone. I race to the only microwave at school, nuke my food, grab a paper and claim a spot in a comfy chair far away from the cafeteria. Today, a classmate asked if I wanted to sit with her. I’ve been going to college for 5 years and I have never been asked to join someone for lunch. Nor have I ever thought to ask someone if they wanted to sit with me. I was floored. So, of course I said yes. I even shared my brownies Robert made for me (a very big leap). I sat with three girls. Two were twins, perky and perkier. I was a little put off by how excited they were. I was expecting a table full of too much mascara and gossip. I figured the most exciting thing we would talk about was Halloween jello shots. Instead I was greeted by education majors who didn’t drink. One even mentioned she was interested in special education. Needless to say it was an awesome lunch. I can’t wait to get back to my poofy chair that conveniently sits underneath a broken vent (nearby chatter goes zzzzzzt), but it is nice to know that there are people out there that are EXCITED to be alive. I applaud excited people, but only if I don’t have to see them everyday. Sometimes my own excitement is too much for me.

I started a new babysitting gig tonight. The mother just needs a few hours a week to breathe. She has two kiddos, 8 months and 2 ½ years, and they are a handful. I am so used to the 4-10 age range. I have a whole bag of tricks and games for older kids, but absolutely nothing for teensy ones. I showed up empty handed, but quickly realized that noise was going to be my new best friend. As long as I stayed on their level and made plenty of noise I was fine. Will this work every time? I hope so.

And just for fun:

Monday, October 06, 2008

This song speaks to me. I identify with it. Don't you?

on a totally different note-
history paper: A
ASL test: B

Saturday, October 04, 2008

only to find out it's you

I rarely put my myspace junk on here, but I have reasons for this that cannot be explained.

Halloween Time


What is the first costume you remember wearing?
My memories of Halloween are almost obsolete. I honestly don’t remember.

What was your favorite costume?
I liked those weird masks my brother and I got from Spencers.

Best Halloween memory as a kid?
The homemade treats I got. I know they don’t do that anymore, but I used to get cookies, candied apples, creepy crochet animals. Those were my favorite things.

Worst Halloween memory as a kid?
When the homemade goodies stopped. Razor blades and poison can sure take the fun out of things.

Ever TP or egg a house?
No, but I really want to TP someone’s house one day. No one has pushed me to that level yet. Damn you all for being so nice to me!

Did you steal other kid’s candy?
Absolutely. Don’t get me wrong, I tried every approach before I resorted to stealing. I tried bartering, dares, kicking, kissing, and buying, but some people just wouldn’t budge when it came to fun dip.

If you were a character in a horror movie, would you survive?
No, I would be the person that you yell at to go in the other direction.

Would you live in a house that was rumored to be haunted?

Would you live in a house where someone had been murdered?

Other than a gun, name the first murder weapon that comes to mind?
Elbows. You all know the maneuver I’m talking about. The one where you take a flying leap onto the person and land on them with your elbows. Hurts like hell.

Would you ever be a mortician?
Yes, a mortician is the type of person who obviously sucked at that game. . . Operation! That’s it. I am definitely up for it. There's no zzzzt! with a dead person.

Do you fit the serial killer profile? W/male/18-32/arson/bedwetter/kills animals
hahAHAHA karAh. I is girl!

Do you believe people can be possessed?
Yes. The only way to know, though, is to kiss them. Don’t do it!

What is something that will haunt you for the rest of your life?
When you watch someone fizz out that definitely sticks with you, but it’s nothing compared to a doll with a mirror for a face. Holy shit imagine being four years old and getting a doll, only to find out it’s you.

How do you feel about death and dying?
It happens. It’s a part of life that is definitely necessary.

Have you ever seen a dead body, other than in a funeral home?
Oh my. Flores!

Were you afraid to go in the ocean after you saw Jaws?
Never saw it.

Would you eat a human if your life depended on it?
I don’t know. I’ve never been in that position.

What was your last nightmare?
Hard to remember.

Rather be buried alive for a night or sleep next to a dead body?
I’m perfectly fine with being buried alive. As long as I have a way to breathe. I’m a claustrophile and I love dirt so what’s the problem?

As an Adult

Do you decorate your house?
Yes, on Halloween we throw dry ice in our pond. The kids love it!

Do you decorate your myspace?
That’s retarded

Do you still dress up for Halloween?

How long have been thinking about this year’s costume?

Planning on attending any parties?

What will you be this year?

What was your favorite costume you wore?
I really don’t have one.

Favorite costume someone else wore?

Funniest Halloween moment?
I don’t have one.

If money is not an issue, what is your dream costume?
I’ll leave that for the freaks.


Do you believe in ghosts?

Have you ever seen one?
Aren’t they invisible?

First thing that pops into your mind....

Murder weapon?
Well I’m sure elbows aren’t going to cut it. Poison?

Scary movie?
Blair Witch Project. Fantastic!


Apparently, sexy.

Not so sexy.

Baked lays.