frisbee love

wine and grapes and barbie parts

All is well in Kansas. I’ve been doing a lot of NOTHING, which is awesome. I started babysitting a little more since the parents I babysit for are in the process of moving. They have this three year old that is a serious trip. Let’s call him ‘G’. G’s whole purpose in life is to hurt as many people as possible, including me. I have more bruises than when I worked at UPS. Crazy huh? We went to an indoor play area yesterday and he took down about 6 toddlers. In the process of apologizing to a very shocked 10 year old (yes, seriously, 10), G turned off the lights which wouldn’t have been such a big deal, BUT they were the kind of lights that take forever to turn back on so all the kids that G didn’t already pinch, kick or hit started wailing. We left pretty soon after that. On another occasion when we were loading up in the car G started running towards this random stranger who just happened to be walking down the street. After chasing G down he started screaming for his mom and YANKED my shirt down during this tantrum. After pulling my shirt back up (full flash people) the guy told me he knew the kid’s parents. Oddly enough he didn’t seem to be phased by the incident, but of course he said he knew the kid.

I’m rethinking my decision to adopt or have kids in the future. Apparently Russia is a no no. I took this job knowing that this kid had problems because I wanted to get a little experience with problematic kids, but most days I barely get in my car before I start crying. I don’t know how the mom does it. I’ve seen her falter a few times, but she holds it together so well. I’m not sure I could ever do that.
On a brighter note I got an awesome surprise yesterday. Josh decided to drop in. . . with ANDY’S FROZEN CUSTARD, 4 tubs of it for my birthday. My LAST birthday, but I’m NOT complaining. I plan on eating it once a week even though I’m on a strict no sugar diet until I reach my next goal weight. I’ve lost about 15 pounds so far. SO I have all this wonderful frozen custard, my favorite kind, to look at and dream about.

Yesterday I tried Pilates for the first time. I went in there with an open mind and was even ok with the instructor being hands on. I love hands on instruction. Touch my butt all you want as long as you show me what I’m doing wrong. Personal space is not an issue because I have a tendency to relax or tense up during fitness classes. BUT I found out yesterday that the hands on approach can go a little too far. Apparently in Pilates where you have a neutral spine your lower back isn’t supposed to rest on the floor. You have to pretend like there’s a tiny grape there and you can’t squish it. Well while focusing on not squishing the grape the instructor told us to find our pubic planes. WTF? Of course I squished the grape after that. But after picking my lower back up again I started to look for my ‘pubic plane’. What the heck I thought. It’s worth a try. At first I thought she wanted us to find THAT muscle. You know what muscle I’m talking about. Well once I found it I put my hands, shaped like a triangle, on it and started flexing. Piece of cake. The pretend grape even seemed to be doing fine. Well she came up and MOVED my hands and told me to make a table for a pretend glass of wine RIGHT ABOVE MY VAGINA. Well like way above but it was still too close and one of my fingers was like right there. While holding up my imaginary wine on the pretend table that rested inside the triangle of my fingers I started to feel my lower back slip. My belly started shaking from laughter which bumped the imaginary table, knocked over the wine and you guessed it, squished the grape. The instructor probably knew I was a bad egg, the real kind, the moment I walked into the class, but she came over and very quietly told me that I needed to keep my pubic plane flat so I could hold up the glass of wine. That’s when she noticed that the ‘grape’ was squished. After straightening me out she told us to make barbie arms and that’s when I lost it. Not only did it sound particularly funny at the time, it LOOKED funny. The wine tipped over as the table turned itself back into a fluffy donut, which is what ALL pubic planes should look like if you ask me, and the grape crumpled beneath me. I didn’t even get my mat rolled up before leaving the room. I was trying too hard not to laugh. Back to yoga it is. At least only the names of the poses are funny in yoga. And if someone does happen to touch me somewhere off limits they won’t be shrieking about wine and grapes and barbie parts. BUT if you want a really really good laugh go try Pilates!

I was actually rather cranky after failing to make it through the Pilates class, but today I played in a tennis tournament and won my games and was instantly reminded that I am not a bad egg.




Take that Pilates!

Tonight I am going to cut loose! The boys are gone for the night and I plan on taking advantage of the evening – big salad with the good ginger dressing and a tall glass of the good stuff in a frosted glass. Robert made me a cute strawberry cheesecake (sugarfree!) with my name spelled out in strawberries and I am going to eat all the strawberries off the top and surround myself with candles and the Arabic music channel. OMG!

I am alive and ok. Thank you for asking.

I am, however, completely overwhelmed. When I got sick last month I got behind on everything, and now I am frantically trying to catch back up.

Unfortunately for the moment there are a few loves of mine that have to be pushed aside until I am caught back up. Blogging and sleep and tennis. Sigh.

Hopefully I will be caught up by next week *crossing fingers*.

I miss you all.

I hope everyone is having a great Easter with their loved ones.

I will be snooping around on blogs here soon. I caught another flu bug (a particularly nasty one) and am hoping that I will be up and running here soon.

Eat some Peeps for me!

the tiny hullabaloo

we were supposed to get a big snow storm over the weekend



but it was just a sprinkle of ice













and only a little snow

good times

My life is full of extraordinary people. Sometimes I am just overwhelmed with all of the love and friendship that sneaks into my life. I just don’t know what to do with it. I just want to throw my hands up and thank somebody, but I’m not sure who to thank. I visited a very special friend on Tuesday. My friend is 80 years old and just went through back surgery. She was definitely not the person I remember but I have hope that she will take off on her Harley and soar again. I also visited my father and he is doing GREAT. He’s moving into a different place which can only be better than where he has been living. He was all smiles and funny dances the whole time that Robert and I visited. We had a picnic in the park with him and the pups and joked and laughed and had such an awesome time.

Tonight Robert and I had dinner and game night with two more dear friends of mine (I think Robert’s falling for them too). They are the daughter and son-in-law of the friend I visited on Tuesday and they are so much FUN. Robert’s mom even joined us! Robert made a great dinner and we played a bunch of silly games.

Tomorrow we are having yet another game night with an oddball assortment of friends. We invited a very spiritual friend of ours. I met her last semester in a class and once she brought cookies for the class and around Christmas she gave everyone candy canes. She transferred to the same college I did this semester and whenever Robert or I run into her she always has something positive to say and if she’s having a bad day she just says that God is teaching her patience. WAY WAY on the other end of the spectrum we have another friend coming who is a total man slut. He loves to get drunk and flirt with the ladies, but he’s such a lovable guy. I met him in my political science class about three years ago and knew he was a keeper. I typically can’t stand people like him but he’s such a funny person. He oversteps boundaries that only my brothers will touch like telling me that I smell LOL. I’m not sure what our spiritual friend will think of his foul language and crazy personality, but she’s been tolerant of me so I think all will be well between the two. It will be very interesting though. I also have a friend I’ve known most of my life coming along with her BFF (HAHA) who is pregnant! It will be a very fun night. We’re making big pans of pasta and there will be strawberry shortcake of course.

And right now I’m talking to my mom. Does life get any better? Nope, don’t think so.

Now if only I could plan a visit to see Robin and Jay and Meander.

Today's youtube love:

I am a huge fan of this choir, and this is one of my most favorite songs.

Youtube wouldn't let me have this one so you'll have to go to youtube to watch it. It's my favorite Willie Nelson tune hands down.





yes, I saved the best for last.

something just for you shit

youtube love:



This is my type of poetry. Even when I write an essay it comes out sounding like def poetry. I used to watch this show all the time. I particularly love this guy. He spits poems like I do but with more oomph and power. I'm like the Enya of def poetry and he's like a white Master P Unh! Damn I need some sleep.

Almost Spring Break!

Psst! I made a 'C' on my science test WOOT!

1234 I know I need to study more

Tomorrow will be the worst day of this week. I have two midterms and I am fearful of both. One is in a science class, and because I failed the first test (yes I bombed it), I cannot fail this one or I flunk the class. The other midterm is not only about 2 novels, a memoir and a few short stories, I also have to know each author's family history, all of their books and their biographical history. I have been studying for hours and hours today and am finally winding down. I'm only to going to study for another couple hours before I call it quits. It's nice to take a break though and sit down with a video from youtube and a cup of hot chocolate.

I love this video because it reminds me of my mom. Just like her this video is simple yet intricate. And like my mom it is whimsical and rather dorky but in such an artful way. It's colorful, relaxing and inviting. And the hand movements at the end? That's exactly how my mom dances when she's in a car.

Feist-1234

Don't worry My soul Jesus walks

I have midterms this week. I told my mom that I might disappear until they are over. She asked me to give her signs that I am still alive. SO, until midterms are over I will be sharing some of my most favorite tidbits from youtube.

(to turn off the music just go the bottom of my page and click on the pause button)

Today's youtube love:



I had to put Keely Smith and Louis Prima first because they are the best. I love All Night Long, but there isn't a good video for it. This one is quite fantastic too. I love how they complement each other. They are so radically different and that's what makes them so much fun to watch.



I love LOVE LOVE this band. I need to get over my fear of bars and go see them. I love this particular video because it's my favorite song by them and at about 2:25 things really pick up and get super crazy. Look how fast they are moving. My favorite member of the band? Washboard Breezy of course.



This music video brings me to my knees every time I see it.
I love so many things about this video:
the gospel music
the beat
the symbolism
the man's face at 1:58
kanye's dance that starts at 2:08
when he takes off his jacket
when he says "they say you can rap about anything except for jesus"

But my FAVORITE part of this video is at 2:25. That part just rips through me and makes me want to take off flying.

everything under the sun (including teeth)

Yesterday I decided to skip my classes. Before yesterday I hadn’t missed a minute, let alone an entire day. I was getting worn out fast and needed a break before spring break. Instead of going back to sleep however I woke up with this unexplainable joy and immediately starting cleaning out the house. I managed to take everything out of the guest bedroom (shelves, bed, dresser, computer equipment etc.) and clean it top to bottom (minus the blinds). I piled up my shoes and made a few sacrifices, organized and found hundreds of poems, finished and unfinished, and unburied an extraordinary amount of nonsense. I discovered that I have exactly 37 pairs of shoes, not including flip flops, about 2 very large Tupperware containers of forgotten poems, and a crazy assortment of Christmas gifts that still haven’t been given away. When I first entered the room I had to climb over things and push from the inside out. I admit that I had trapped myself in the room and had no other choice but to clean if I were to ever see daylight again. I found pay stubs and bank receipts from over 4 years ago. Every little piece of paper that anyone I love or loved or thought I loved had written anything on, including rummy scores and grocery lists, had been piled into boxes and sealed shut. I found teeth that I had lost as a child, love notes from boyfriends in 6th grade, obituaries of strangers that had apparently touched me, old girl scout badges, tags from every animal I have loved, friendship rocks and shells and pieces of myself that managed to get buried beneath years of disregard and junk. I threw a lot away, but I would be lying if I said that I didn’t hang on to most of it. It was a tough battle, but I feel victorious. After the guest bedroom I cleaned the rest of the house, which was in much better shape, but when you have two golden retrievers you’re always going to have something to sweep or pick up. Yesterday was such a powerful day. I’m the first to admit that I tend to hang onto people and things that need to be freed, but admitting it doesn’t make it any easier to let go.


I woke up happy today. I feel like I slept for 2000 years last night. The first thing I did was reach for my new dress. I knew I couldn’t wear it just yet or I’d freeze my ass off, but I touched it anyway. I have managed to mysteriously lose almost two sizes (without losing weight). Last week Robert and I went shopping and found a dress. He liked it so much that he got it for me. Buying a dress sounds so simple. Women (and some men too) wear dresses every day. I don’t. It is not something I take for granted. I am very short, 5’1, and very muscular with a booty that puts J Lo to shame. Basically I’m like a pear-shaped Arnold Schwarzenegger. Dresses only go on so far before they get stuck and that’s not a position I want to be in when I’m in the dressing room at a mall. This dress beat insurmountable odds and now hangs like a miracle in my closet. I cannot wait to wear it. I have everything planned out, the shoes, the hair, the lip gloss color. Everything. I have touched it so many times that I am worried that holes might appear, but touching it is the only way to start my day.


Today I worked mostly on a paper that I am writing for a very scary class. I am writing about The Awakening, which really touched me. I had to find a scholarly article about the book and write about the article. It doesn’t sound like a big deal, right? Well I wanted to find somebody who wrote about Edna’s bisexuality, but I could only find writers who shyly approached the topic briefly before quickly moving on. I was beginning to get angry, because as a feminist text, this book should have several articles about Edna’s bisexuality. When I met with my teacher last week I was exasperated and lost. I had barely explained my dilemma before she whipped out an article on Edna’s lesbianism. I read the article and it took my breath away. If you haven’t read the book I’m going to tell you right now that Edna supposedly commits suicide by swimming out into the ocean until she gets exhausted. But here’s the problem. I didn’t want her to die. When everyone told me that she did, I didn’t believe them. I was going to keep her alive at any cost. I wanted so badly to believe that she surrendered and made love to the ocean, but I felt like my opinion was just wishful thinking. All the research that I could find stated that she died. I should have just said the hell with them and trusted my own opinions. But I let myself get defeated and on the day we discussed the book in class I sacrificed my participation points for the day and said nothing. I couldn’t tell the class that rather than dying at the end Edna was surrendering to the lover that awakened her at the beginning. I didn’t want to take such a fragile bud of a thought and throw it against such a sound judgement. I couldn’t suggest that Edna’s bisexuality and even lesbianism, sure, were sprinkled throughout the novel. When the teacher handed me this article I was skeptical. Bisexuality was pushing it in my opinion, so lesbianism had never entered my mind. But as I read the article I was swayed. It was such a profound article with such substantial evidence. The article proved that at least one scholar had considered Edna’s bisexuality. The article also illuminates the coward in me that couldn’t stand up against a large crowd and declare my opinion.


While I was writing my paper somebody started banging on the door. It wasn’t just a light tap tap tap. It sounded like the person wanted to tear the house down. When I opened the door I had to refrain from laughing because it was Charlie, our mailman. Charlie is deaf, and at times I wonder if he thinks everyone else is deaf too. He’s such a likable person though. He’s always stopping to chat with Robert, Audrey (Robert’s mom, who lives across the street), or I. Usually he just likes to talk, but occasionally he needs help with something. Today he appeared quite frantic as he waved one of his hands in my face. He had a tiny cut and asked for a band-aid. I went and grabbed the first aid kit and brought back antiseptic wipes, Neosporin, and a band-aid (we have the works because of all the kiddos that come around). As I was cleaning him up he kept trying to sign with his hand. It was worse than putting a band-aid on a caffeinated kid, but he was so excited because he saw Robert’s smoker. He kept signing, “I have a bigger and better smoker”. I called Robert and told him that Charlie had a better smoker. Of course he couldn’t believe it. I know that the next time they see each other there is going to be a war about the smokers. But it was such a comical experience. After he left I went to get the mail and there was nothing. He didn’t deliver my block’s mail for another 30 minutes which means that he went out of his way to come here when he needed help. That makes me feel good. One of these days I need to invite him and his family over for supper. And he can bring his own damn smoked meat.


Well I don’t want to talk your ear off…

Oh what a night

First, I went to grab a bite to eat before the big night and while I was in the parking lot someone backed into my car.




While I was waiting for the police I managed to lock myself out of my car so I had to ask the police officer to send someone to unlock my car. To my embarrassment a huge tow truck showed up and charged me $35, but they made it sound like I was getting a deal. I call B.S.

But the evening ended well when I finally got to meet James Mcbride. He gave a lecture tonight at KU, and it was phenomenal. He was quite opinionated and very animated. He used his tie as a prop several times. It was a very colorful and captivating lecture. If you haven't read anything by him you are missing out!

Proof!

frozen bananas and droopy blossoms

So what did I do for Valentine’s Day?

Oh how do I romanticize snot and despair? Let’s start with Thursday. On Thursday I woke up with a very raw sore throat. I went to school, fought my way through a test and even managed to eat a salad with peppers in it. The whole day I longed to go home and wrap myself up in heated blankets and golden retriever love, but I fought against that urge and made it through the day. Friday started sluggish so I tucked myself into my office and busied myself with blog work. I spent a great amount of time sorting through old posts of my favorite bloggers, kicking myself silently for missing out on a chunk of their lives (during Christmas of all things!), and writing pieces of their poems on sticky notes to think about for the day. I do this a lot with one of my favorite bloggers, Mark. Reading his blog is just like sitting down with one of my favorite books of poems (Go check him out if you haven’t already). Sometimes I have to wander through a poem several times before I realize why it struck me so. So, Friday I took just for me in hopes that the sore throat would surrender. By Friday night I was on my knees in tears. I could barely sleep, because it hurt to swallow and my entire back and stomach felt bruised and sunburned. When Saturday greeted me I only wanted to kick its face in, but I was too miserable. I didn’t want Robert to leave me alone. I thought that I was going to faint and knock my face in or something worse so he remained faithfully by my side. During this time I had completely lost my voice and was besieged with a mad desire for frozen bananas. He got right in the car and came back with not only the bananas but also a beautiful bouquet of tulips and irises (oddly enough tulips are my favorite and irises are my mother’s). They were in a sorry state like me, but he promised that as I got better the flowers would blossom. By Sunday the irises had thrown their purple all over the place, and my voice came back. Today I was greeted by a few tentative tulip blossoms as they struggled to outshine the irises. I knew that the dreaded cold was behind me.

Interestingly enough I was trying to figure out what Robert and I had done for previous VDays. For awhile I thought we were turning into two old frumps, but now that I think about it there is so much new love in the little surprises. Our first Valentine’s Day in 2006 was unbelievably powerful and surreal. We were in Guatemala with my mother, and on Valentine’s Day we went to Tikal to see the ruins. The next year we tried too hard with foo foo gifts. In 2008 Robert was sick with a sinus infection and while he was sleeping I snuck out and got him comfy socks and vitamin C. I remember the beauty of Tikal and the simple passion Robert and I had for each other. I remember the thrill of surprising him with something warm, something useful, wrapped in red heart paper. But I do not remember anything about the foo foo of 2007.

So what did I do for this year’s ♥ Day? I ate frozen bananas with my best friend and waited for the flowers to bloom.

Oh and Robin here is the list of books I'm most excited about:

Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass by Frederick Douglass
The Awakening by Kate Chopin
A Good Man is Hard to Find and Other Stories by Flannery O'Connor
Eight Men by Richard Wright
Notes From Underground by Fyodor Dostoevsky
All But My Life by Gerda Weissmann Klein

for robin

The music you are hearing is all the way at the bottom of the page. Just hit the pause button to turn it off.

aok

I am still alive, and very much so! I am absolutely overjoyed with this new university I am attending. it is taking up much of my time. I am taking two reading/writing intensive courses - there is a special stack of books (20+) just for these two classes, but it is finally a reading list I am madly in love with. I used to read summaries and reviews of books online instead of reading the actual books (and make mostly A's sadly enough), but this semester I have been sneaking my books to bed and work with me. I've even been reading between games at tennis. But please don't fret; I've still been sneaking around on blogs.
I'm also taking another poetry workshop class. I am so glad that I am taking this class. I have been unburying my poems and writing new ones too. When I took the dogs for a run this evening I subjected them to bits of rhyme between breaths. I feel like I'm alive again.
I hope to jump back into blogging full force here soon. Thanks for your patience.

P.S. I made the Dean's list again last semester! I really think there should be a monetary award for this.

home

I am finally home! After we got back from Florida Robert and I drove to Arizona to see my mom, grandma and STINKY Scott. We had a total blast. We drove up Mount Lemmon, hit 4th street twice, hiked the Santa Catalina Mountains, went to the Biosphere2 and grilled out almost every night. We took Rose and Ella with us and they had a grand time tromping around with my mom and grandma's dog, (it's really a rat) Lulu. Robert's mom flew out for the last two days of the trip and drove back with us. On our way back we set out for the Petrified Forest, but got stuck in Heber after they barricaded the roads due to a snow storm. After we saw the gift shop at the Petrified Forest (the forest was buried under snow) we drove to the Grand Canyon, but when we got there it started to snow again so we saw very little (mostly the gift shop). We stopped at the Hoover Dam and took an awesome tour and meandered through Las Vegas, but only long enough to get agitated with the traffic. We then drove through Colorado until they closed I 70 because of (you guessed it) snow! We didn't have to wait very long though and didn't have a single problem with the Eisenhower tunnel. After that we drove straight home and arrived at 3 this morning. We have hundreds, if not thousands of pictures to sort through so it may be awhile before I post pictures. I am going to try to figure out a way to post a photo gallery for those pictures, but my Florida pictures are on my myspace. Go check them out!

still here

I am alive.

I hope the holidays were pleasant for everyone. Thank you Robin for the card. I got it right before I left!

I cannot use my cell phone and have no internet here (I'm in AZ). I was very lucky to get this little bit of internet time. I am not ignoring you. I cannot wait to read blogs and get back on track when I get home (by Thursday).

Happy New Year!

it's that time again

I am leaving for Florida in a couple of days. I'll be done with all my finals by Wednesday. . . Yay!


1.) Wrapping paper or gift bag? A little bit of both. I think that if I had more time (I’m at school now folks waiting for my next final so this doesn’t count) that I would make homemade wrapping paper and go all out, but Robert is the wrapping pro around here. His patience is astonishing.

2.) Real tree or artificial? No tree : ( haven’t had a tree in 3 years. There is just no time. No family to enjoy it. And I’m sure Ella would eat it : ) But we put up stockings for the dogs this year.

3.) When do you put up the tree? Someday I would like to start a tradition of putting it up on Thanksgiving or thereabouts.

4.) When do you take the tree down? Easter sounds like a good time Robin : )

5.) Do you like eggnog? A tiny sip with breakfast during December.

6.) Favorite gift received as a child? I liked getting money and making my own decisions. The whole once a year trip to the mall thing was such a fantastic idea. I have such great memories of that.

7.) Hardest person to buy for? Robert and oftentimes Scott the snot.

8.) Easiest person to buy for? My mom, grandma and Louis. I generally start finding things at craft fairs and such throughout the year. Rarely do I go out and search for something for them. Their presents always find me.

9.) Do you have a Nativity scene? nope

10.) Mail or e-mail Christmas cards? That’s not a bad idea. I don’t think I’ve ever mailed Christmas cards. Have I? Someday I’ll have time for that.


11.) Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Nothing terrible but I dare not say.

12.) Favorite Christmas movie? Home Alone!

13.) When do you start shopping for Christmas? All the time. Throughout the year.

14.) Have you ever recycled a Christmas gift? Of course. Some people are awfully nice to think of me but do not know me very well.

15.) Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Uhhh oooh umm I remember grandma’s rolls. Those were awesome, but I generally don’t eat the same thing every year.

16.) Lights on the tree? Why have a tree with no lights?

17.) Favorite Christmas song? have yourself a merry little christmas

18.) Travel at Christmas or stay home? I like to travel ; )

19.) Can you name all of Santa's reindeer (problem solved)? I probably could if I tried


20.) Angel on the tree top or a star? I think the top of the tree should be reserved for something phenomenal. If an angel or star floats your goat then go for it.

21.) Open presents Christmas morning? Throughout the year. People give me Christmas presents throughout the year and sometimes they don’t even know it.

22.) Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Too much of all the great things: Christmas music, Christmas cheer, false hope, decorations. . .

23.) Favorite ornament, theme or color? I have absolutely no ornaments. I thought about stealing our old ones from the old house but Gene had everything so freaking organized. I think if I had to put up a tree I would paint a bunch of popcorn pink and throw it on there.

24.) Favorite for Christmas dinner? Vegan stuffing.

25.) What do you want for this Christmas? My mom, grandma, brothers, dogs and Robert. But this year I’ll miss Rusty again. 3 years is too long.

26.) Who is most likely to respond to this? My mom

27.) Who is most unlikely to respond to this? The lurkers (I love you grandma!)

no rotten fruit please

I normally don't throw my writings around, but I'm fairly positive that this is going to be something that I'm going to pretend I didn't write later on down the road. I wrote this for a class. . . already turned it in. It's a series of haikus based on Edgar Allan Poe's the Tell-Tale Heart. If you're a diehard fan of this poem please refrain from throwing rotten fruit at me.

Paranoia kills
But only those with weird eyes
The crazy ones live

One guy tripping out
Heaven and hell colliding
Noises everywhere

Gentle, nice old man
The cute grandfatherly type
Santa Claus perhaps

Santa Claus is screwed
His eye is blue, filmy too
Blue, filmy eyes scare

Blue is unnerving
Like a bird of prey, it probes
Like ice, it splinters

The Psycho giggles
He has an awesome idea!
Death to Santa Claus!

He sneaks and creeps in
Laughing like crickets and wind
All set to murder

Dreaming of crickets
Santa Claus is sound asleep
Unaware for now

His eye seized by light
The psycho lights up the blue
As Santa stiffens

Santa's heart wakes up
The psycho hears the thumping
And gets excited

But oh the neighbors!
Time to off Saint Nicholas!
Turn his ticker off

Slice him bit by bit
And hide him under the floor
Brilliant plan I say

A knock on the door
What the hell is going on?
Just a bad nightmare

The psycho falters
He hears the heart start to beat
Can they hear it too?

A madman gives up
Too much stress to hide murder
He confesses all

still here

I haven't disappeared. . . yet.

It's been tough around here recently. I've been having family problems (nothing to do with my momalu), but I'm hopeful that whatever happens will happen for the best. I'm sorry, but I just cannot share this problem with you.

It's also the end of another semester, another few credits to add to my collection of well over one hundred. Exchange a credit for a bit of life, of youthfulness. That's how it goes.

I am going for the degree I have wanted all my life. I found a way to make it happen, and nothing but death can stop me now. Rockchalk Jayhawk! I'll be graduating at the same time, but hopefully it's one step closer to a happier me.

Right now though I'm a little stressed grrrrrr. I slept until noon today. . . I have my annual doctor's appointment tomorrow. It's a funny thing because I made this appointment a few weeks ago and yesterday I got sick. Go figure. I'm sure it's minor-strep or an infection of some kind. I knew I was going to have problems when I touched a sick person's cat on Saturday-not recommended.

On a brighter note? Guess what Robert got me for my birthday? A PLANE TICKET TO SEE LOUIS! So, I'm going to see Louis and Robert is going on a cruise (lucky bastard, but not as lucky as me). Hopefully my mom can squeeze us in over the holidays too : ) *fingers crossed*

So, I haven't disappeared yet. I've been reading blogs, lurking around. Please don't be worried.